Archive for 'Relationships'

The Primary Difference Between Polyamory and Monogamy

By Mystic Life

The reason most traditional relationships end is due to one (or more) of what I’ll refer to as “The Three D’s”: Drifting, Dysfunction and Desire.

Drifting occurs when two people evolve in different directions, and no longer feel a common bond that they once shared. Of course, a certain degree of variation in interests and values is typical, but when members of a relationship have significantly “drifted ...

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Redefining Faithfulness

By Mystic Life

I was recently asked, via my blog, to respond to the question I’ve listed below from a woman who was (like most of us) raised to be monogamous.

Upon reflection, I felt that my response may be helpful to readers who are still in the process of defining their values, or who perhaps have friends or family who try to challenge their choice to be polyamorous by stating it requires them to be “unfaithful” to their partner.

“Why is it ...

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Can You Be “Poly” and Date a Cheater?

By Mystic Life

Most polyamorous people are drawn to this lovestyle because of their distaste for cheating. But what about if you’re dating someone who is cheating on their partner? Perhaps you don’t even know their partner and are therefore not required to lie to (or withhold from) your lover’s lover. You might then be able to feel as though you’re an honest person with no inner-conflict because, ...

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Marriage, Primacy, and Control: What Rights Do We Have?

Several of the articles published here on PepTalk recently have treated the subject of relinquishing power over those we love.  It is a common refrain in polyamorous circles: possessiveness, control, and power-grasping are all harmful to the full expression of one’s love.

For my own part, I couldn’t agree more.  Yet at the same time, I find myself struggling at times with relationship definitions – and what expectations are associated with them.  It’s quite true, as Robyn writes in this ...

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Shifting The Monogamy Paradigm

By Robyn Trask
Reprinted from Loving More Magazine issue 35, Copyright 2005

One of the questions asked most frequently by polyamorous couples is “how do we make polyamory work for us while maintaining our relationship as a couple?”  The question is easy; the answer is at once both simple and complex:  You don’t!

Many people — myself included — are working to make their poly relationships viable and sustainable while using tools ...

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Polyamory Without Attachment To Form

By Mystic Life

I have learned that polyamory can be used to dissolve the ego, or enhance it.  Similar to how nuclear technology can be used to either power a city or destroy it, the poly path can be utilized to bring us closer to peace, or create endless suffering through multiple attachments.  In other words, we can let go of controlling others, or we can create multiple ...

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Real Polyamorous Families

The concept of polyamory is often misunderstood by the general public and the media. Tell someone you are polyamorous and it conjures images for the average person of swing parties and clubs with people getting it on in dark corners or polygamous families with men controlling unhappy sister wives and lots of children. These images perpetuated by Hollywood are not polyamory, nor do they even represent ...

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My 1st Exposure to Polyamory: The Witches of Eastwick

Back in college I went to a party with some friends who were visiting from out of town, and apparently one of the women at the party had noticed me. She called and asked if I’d like to go to a movie with her. I honestly had no recollection of who she was until we met, and it would turn out later that I actually liked her friend (a recurring theme for many years during my monogamous phase). The movie ...

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Is Marriage The Union We Want?

WeddingCoupleMarriage is a hot topic these days, from gay activists fighting for equality to the conservative right insisting marriage is the very foundation of civilization and allowing gay marriage is a sign of the destruction of society. Then there is the slippery slope argument that if we allow same sex marriage it will lead to legalized polygamy and “oh my god” polyamory. Not to mention people will ...

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Loving More Loving Choices Colorado

Click for Complete Seminar Details and To Register Now

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Tentative Schedule

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Friday April 22

7:00pm – 11:00pm

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Super Cuddly

With Reid Mihalko

A Cuddle Party is: A structured, safe ...

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