Comments on: The Primary Difference Between Polyamory and Monogamy http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/ Fri, 26 Apr 2013 16:35:07 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.5.1 By: Mystic Life http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-374 Mystic Life Thu, 29 Nov 2012 23:05:12 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-374 Hi Samantha,

Thank you for your feedback and taking the time to share your thoughts and feelings. It sounds like you’re aware of yourself and your process.

Peace,
Chris (pen name, Mystic Life)
http://www.SpiritualPolyamory.com

]]> By: Samantha http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-373 Samantha Wed, 14 Nov 2012 22:58:24 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-373 Thank you for this article. I have found it most helpful to reflect on opening and letting go, especially of the need for security. This itself requires deep psychological work as the lack of security growing up creates adults like me who are hypervigilant and try to control their surroundings. In this letting go, I am able to hear others’ needs instead of, in my triggered state, shaming them.

My boyfriend and I have been in conversations about monogamy vs. polyamory since we started dating. My issues of jealousy and need for security mean that I need to do more personal work, and his fear of commitment and fear of not being good enough for me also need to be worked on, as, like you said, fear is a terrible foundation for polyamory. I appreciate how you’ve explained these ideas. I think it’s also helpful for me to reflect that polyamory is not for everyone, and that there can be ethical and responsible behavior in monogamy, too.

]]> By: Inside the Cheating-Industrial ComplexAstrology and Horoscopes by Eric Francis http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-369 Inside the Cheating-Industrial ComplexAstrology and Horoscopes by Eric Francis Sat, 20 Oct 2012 21:00:10 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-369 [...] And for the spiritual viewpoint, again, I’d recommend a visit to the full article, published in February in Loving More, and on their website. [...]

]]> By: stacey http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-368 stacey Sun, 07 Oct 2012 10:23:56 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-368 mono life is sooo much better than poly..why would anyone join poly which does not even looks like a true form of love!!!

]]> By: Mystic Life http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-367 Mystic Life Thu, 09 Aug 2012 23:39:16 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-367 Hi Kitty,

I’m glad you found my article useful. Yes, it can feel lonely to be on an alternative path, but as awareness grows, there will be many others who choose polyamory.

You can look for support groups by searching for “polyamory” at Yahoo Groups & Meetup.com. You can also use the forums at Polymatchmaker.com

You may contact me directly via my site http://SpiritualPolyamory.com

Peace,
Chris (pen name, Mystic Life)

]]> By: Kitty http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-366 Kitty Wed, 11 Jul 2012 15:59:36 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-366 I wish I could respond to this post with my real name. I have been in a poly relationship for about a year now. I’m set to marry my long-term boyfriend soon and hope, in years to come, a commitment ceremony is something I can share with the newer boyfriend in my life.

Often I feel very alone and I feel as though the three of us are wading through a minefield. Who to tell, who not to, who to try and act vague in front of… At some point, I will be using this article when we invariably come out to family who won’t understand. I want to thank you for your frankness because it puts into words things I often can’t.

I wonder, are there support forums with (relative) anonymity out there? I’d like to be able to talk with you or folks like you through more than the means of a comment.

It’s so nice to not feel alone. Well, not too alone as I’m blessed to have two who love me so very much.

]]> By: Mystic Life http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-365 Mystic Life Fri, 04 May 2012 01:06:55 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-365 Michael, without attachment you can experience things of this world without needing them. You can eat without making food an addiction. You can have sex without compulsive neediness. Non-attachment is not removing ourselves from the experiences of this world, but removing ourselves from needing them to feel at peace. Sex doesn’t only occur from a place of seeking it to fill a void. It also arises from feelings of love and closeness. Polyamory is allowing one’s self to love more than one. Non-attachment as a spiritual practice is the ongoing commitment to be at peace regardless of whether one has zero, 1, 2 or more partners at any point in time.

]]> By: Michael http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-364 Michael Wed, 21 Mar 2012 16:46:17 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-364 “There are many people on the spiritual and/or personal growth path who allow
Hi Mystic Life,

monogamy to be the one facet of their life in which they believe they should still be allowed “attachment.” It doesn’t work. Attachment to anything or anyone still leads to suffering. There are no loopholes.”

So what I want to know is, if we have no attachments and have self love, why would we seek sex, isn’t that an attachment and desire. I would imagine that being in the state of non attachment and self love, the desire would not exist to have multiple partners, we would be satisfied with what we have. It would be a peace of mind, we would be enraptured in that state.

]]> By: Mystic Life http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-363 Mystic Life Wed, 29 Feb 2012 04:17:34 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-363 Liana, you’re welcome. I’m glad the words I wrote resonate so strongly for you. It sounds like you are passionate about your draw towards unconditional love, and that polyamory is your natural way of loving others :)

]]> By: Mystic Life http://www.lovemore.com/poly/the-primary-difference-between-polyamory-and-monogamy/#comment-362 Mystic Life Wed, 29 Feb 2012 04:15:59 +0000 http://www.lovemore.com/blog/?p=1503#comment-362 Aaron, I’m glad you found my prior comment helpful. I appreciate you sharing about your situation and am sorry to hear you’ve run into some judgment with your choices. It’s ironic that a choice that comes from a place of love can be met with such negativity, but many people are threatened by what they don’t understand. Until they can accept your truth, they can’t offer very much on your path of growth, so stick to your true path and love yourself enough to be authentic.

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