Posts Tagged 'open relationships'

Primary, Secondary: The Misunderstanding of Hierarchy in Polyamorous Relating

Primary, Secondary: The Misunderstanding of Hierarchy in Polyamorous Relating

94019988Being polyamorous in a mono-centric and dominator culture can be at times confusing. Often people lack the language, skills and mindset to understand their own feelings and complexity of their relationships let alone explain this to others. To cope with some of these issues the polyamory community has created language and constructs to help in dealing and explaining some of the issues faced in polyamorous relationships. One ...

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An Adventure in Polyamorous Love and Personal Growth

An Adventure in Polyamorous Love and Personal Growth

Romantic relationships come in many forms; some are magical brief encounters while others are deep emotional bonds that last a lifetime. Yet often relationships are judged and valued based solely on how long the relationship lasts and not the quality, lessons and growth we take away. When a relationship is short-lived people tend to trivialize it and even sometimes demonize the relationship or person as a way to cope with the pain they feel. Why is it that we ...

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What Do Polys Want?: An Overview of the 2012 Loving More Survey

What Do Polys Want?: An Overview of the 2012 Loving More Survey

Polyamory Research Survey Background

From February 10th to April 2nd 2012, Loving More, with the endorsement of the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) conducted an internet-based survey of over 4000 participants who self-identify as polyamorous. This is the largest survey of self-identified polyamorous individuals to date. Individuals were recruited through local and regional listserves, Loving More email list, the PolyResearchers list, the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality’s (IASHS) student and alumni lists, and the American Association ...
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Grief and Loss Among the Polys

Grief and Loss Among the Polys

By John Ullman

S has been gone for over eight years now. She died suddenly, a heart attack, at 61. Her death shocked our poly community, many of us being close to her age. We had lost another of us some years before, but it was an accident, a car wreck. Then we were stunned. But when S died, we were rudely made aware of our own mortality.

91911356Her ...

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A Multiplicity of Valentine Hearts

A Multiplicity of Valentine Hearts

Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love. Kids scrawl out valentines to exchange at school. Stores are packed with cards, flowers and chocolates of every kind. Red and pink satin and lace lingerie litter the shopping malls. A day focused on couples, or at least coupling, makes it easy to forget that Love doesn’t have to be limited to only one person or that ...

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Between Two Worlds

An Introduction to Social Polyamory – By Nancy & Darrell Casey
Copy Right 2005 -Reprinted from Loving More Magazine Issue #35 Summer 2005

“When it’s time to cum, you have to go,” was the humorous comment I’d often make as newcomers were introduced to “Rainbow”, which was an off premise Lifestyle Swing club. “Off premise” meant that dance activity was limited to making sensual and social connections; overt sexuality was not allowed. ...

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Why is Polyamory so Hard to Define?

Polyamory and the exact meaning of the word is often the subject of debate among self-identified polyamorous people. It has been much debated on websites, at conferences and discussion groups around the country. Even among leading polyamory activists the term is debated over and over again. What is the source of the controversy?

Webster’s Dictionary defines polyamory as “the state or practice of having more than one open romantic relationship at a ...

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The Primary Difference Between Polyamory and Monogamy

By Mystic Life

The reason most traditional relationships end is due to one (or more) of what I’ll refer to as “The Three D’s”: Drifting, Dysfunction and Desire.

Drifting occurs when two people evolve in different directions, and no longer feel a common bond that they once shared. Of course, a certain degree of variation in interests and values is typical, but when members of a relationship have significantly “drifted ...

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The Shame Game: The Reality of Testing for STIs

Annual testing for STIs (sexually transmitted infection) is something I believe every sexually active person should do for their health, not just for people who are in some form of open relationship but anyone sexually active. It is part of being safe and sane with our own health. Unfortunately testing can often be source of shame and negativity for women and men seeking testing.

For several years I chose to go to the Boulder Women’s clinic, a seemingly progressive place in ...

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Redefining Faithfulness

By Mystic Life

I was recently asked, via my blog, to respond to the question I’ve listed below from a woman who was (like most of us) raised to be monogamous.

Upon reflection, I felt that my response may be helpful to readers who are still in the process of defining their values, or who perhaps have friends or family who try to challenge their choice to be polyamorous by stating it requires them to be “unfaithful” to their partner.

“Why is it ...

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